For all those who still believe that the United States is a “democracy”, simply look at what is happening with voter suppression, voter manipulation, and campaign laws permitting shady spending.
And, those still believing in the impartiality of courts, merely look at judgments handed down based upon political leaning/demands
Democratic Voters Hope Election Day Means Democrats Will Stop Texting Them
By Andy Borowitz
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Democratic voters are anxiously awaiting Election Day in the hope that Democratic candidates and activists will finally stop texting them, a new poll shows.
In conversations with Democratic voters across the country, “No longer being texted by Democrats” has emerged as one of the most important issues to them in the 2020 campaign.
“Don’t get me wrong: I love the fact that they’re trying to end this Trump nightmare,” Carol Foyler, a Democratic voter in New Hampshire, said. “I’m just not sure that I need to be reminded five times a day to vote when I voted by mail a month ago.”
Harland Dorrinson, who lives in Las Vegas, agreed. “I got a phone call in the middle of the night, and my heart raced because I thought it might be a family emergency,” he said. “It was just Joe Biden telling me that he and Kamala need my support.”
Tracy Klugian, a resident of Des Moines, said that, while he appreciated the texts from Democrats at first, “It now feels like borderline stalking.”
“They keep texting me because I donated twenty-five dollars to defeat Joni Ernst a few months ago,” he said. “But I guess now I feel like—oh, wait a second, I’m getting a call. Never mind, it’s just Barack Obama.”
I spotted this title of a New Yorker article:
Noam Chomsky Believes Trump Is “the Worst Criminal in Human History”
Someone finally agrees with what I’ve pointed out many times
Jared Kushner Asks Dad to Bribe His Way Into Electoral College
By Andy Borowitz
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—With less than a week until Election Day, Jared Kushner has asked his father to bribe his way into the Electoral College.
Noting that Charles Kushner donated two and a half million dollars to Harvard before his son was accepted, Jared pointed out that his dad “might have to pony up more this time around.”
“The Electoral College only accepts five hundred and thirty-eight applicants,” he reportedly told his dad. “Even Lori Loughlin couldn’t get her kids in.”
In addition to persuading his father to “make it rain on the E.C.,” Jared said that he was putting together a “stellar” application.
“I’m pretty sure I can get a letter of recommendation from Bob Woodward,” he said. “We had an awesome interview.”
Between his father’s “Benjamins” and his own “rock-star status,” Jared said that his admission to the Electoral College should be “a lock,” arguing, “How can they turn down the guy who ended the pandemic?
I wonder, if deep down in his thoughts, Joe Biden is hoping to lose the election.
He must be aware of the pandemic raging across the country and the challenge facing any leader willing to accept reality. He will inherit a mess caused by the incumbent. Who would want that? This is a no-win situation for the winner of the election.
Kavanaugh Supports Cutoff For Vote-Counting But Not for Drinking
By Andy Borowitz
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In an opinion that sparked controversy in legal circles, Brett Kavanaugh wrote that there should be a cutoff for vote-counting but not for drinking.
The Supreme Court Justice wrote that, while ballots received after midnight on Election Night should not be counted, drink orders placed after closing time at a bar should always be honored.
“While the Constitution does not guarantee the right to vote, it clearly enshrines the right to drink,” Kavanaugh wrote. “If a patron is seated at a bar at midnight, drinking should be allowed to continue for hours, if not days, until drinking has been completed.”
Kavanaugh added that there is “no scenario in which it would be right to cut a drinker off.”
“If, for example, a drinker is at a bar after a UB40 concert and some other dudes start dissing UB40, and the dude—the first one—starts punching the other dudes, cutting off that dude would be bogus,” he wrote, adding, “UB40 is the best band evahhhh!”
Trump Tells Stranded Omaha Supporters That Buses Are Rounding the Turn
By Andy Borowitz
OMAHA (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump told supporters who were stranded in freezing temperatures when campaign buses failed to materialize on Tuesday night that the buses were “rounding the turn.”
“The buses will be there very soon,” Trump said. “We are moving very powerfully on buses.”
“One minute, there are no buses, and then, suddenly, like magic, there are buses,” he said. “It’ll be a miracle.”
Trump blasted the media for criticizing the absence of buses instead of emphasizing the “fantastic job I’ve done on buses.”
“The other day, a very smart and respected man called me, and said, ‘Sir, you have the most amazing buses,’ ” Trump said. “But CNN doesn’t report that, because they are horrible people.”
On Wednesday morning, the Trump campaign Web site added to the list of the President’s first-term accomplishments: “Buses.”
I noticed on some news channel that (another) typhoon (that’s Asian for hurricane, for the ignorant out there) is heading towards Vietnam. That country has suffered as badly as the Gulf Coast this year.
The scenes from Vietnam and the weather forecast reminded me of a time long ago, when I endured a typhoon in Vietnam. Then, as now, the country was not prepared or able to withstand the impact of nature. Vast swaths of landscape were flooded, roads became unusable, and bridges washed away.
Anything not tied down was in peril, as the photos below show.
The rich kids were fortunate, because we had concrete hangers, designed to withstand artillery fire, but rather good at protecting against wind. We also could take to the air to avoid flooded roads.
This was a time when the US Government was handing over responsibility for the war to the Vietnamese. Some of us had a hunch that the way they took care of the equipment we provided might be metaphor for how they would succeed.
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
NB. Just look at the US Senate, among others.
Let preface this by claiming that I am not a “communist” or a “socialist” as uninformed Americans might define them. I have benefited from a form of capitalism.
But, I do believe in fairness. This might come from my character or the Christian education, which was imposed upon my in my younger years. We learned about sharing—the patron saint of my school was St. Martin; a large painting of him sharing his cloak with a beggar hung in the dining hall— and giving.
When I hear rapid supporter Republican whining about Democrats wanting to turn the country into a socialist nation, I must scratch my head. What Bible to they read? Are they bowing down to a different Jesus than the mythical figure I learned about? They seem to fear that someone might receive help…someone trying to put a roof over his or her family or feed his or her family, etc. They feel that these people will “play” the system.
No one complains about the upper reaches of society “playing” the system to become even wealthier. What about oil depletions allowances, tax write-offs, and who knows what?
A nation is sick, when a self-proclaimed billionaire pays less tax than someone working three jobs to survive. That country needs more than socialism. And, anyone waving a Bible and railing against “socialism” is a goddam hypocrite. They will give money to their “church”, so that the “preacher” can live in luxury and fly in his private jet, but will not help the poor and needy. I have nothing but disdain for these people, and not because I am a “communist” or “socialist”, but because I am a decent human being.
Prior to writing novels, the author enjoyed a multifaceted career: from decorated combat aviator to advertising professional to global communications director of a major consumer brand. He has traveled the world and met sports, film and television stars, political leaders, and royalty. He graduated from Middlebury College, is married, lives in Germany, and has two grown children.